my mom just said “watch this” then ran a red light and said “i just don’t care”
when you’re hungry and you remember there’s leftovers
when you realize someone already ate them
My level of sarcasm’s gotten to a point where I don’t even know if I’m kidding or not.
This shit better work
y’all count as all my friends we coo
Friend: Ill be there in 5 minutes are you ready?